Wizard Banished - What What Banishment

What’s with these shiny novelties, contraptions new and sleek?
Back then a sturdy staff was all the magic we would need.
And if a staff was missing—well, a wand would surely do,
Plus a pointy hat to tell you who’s about to hex your brood!

But now they mutter “banishment,” some bureaucratic stunt;
I’m exiled to the wastelands for a clerical affront.

Banishment? Really—this the freshest trend in spite?
Strip the wizard of his tower, kick him out into the night.
You fancy modern punishments, but hear my gravelled plea:
I’ll curse your fancy paperwork—just give my trinkets back to me!

I lost my shabby cottage, all the gold beneath the floor,
My bubbling cauldrons, silken robes, enchanted pantry door.
I’d list the rest of what I owned, but here’s the wizard’s hitch:
I haven’t got a clue now—memory’s fallen in a ditch!

They claim they wiped my grandeur clean, a “fresh start” (how polite!)
But genius fried to scrambled eggs still isn’t appet‑ite.

Banishment? Really—this the hottest fad in law?
Confiscate a wizard’s memories, applaud, then drop the draw.
You meddle with my history, yet smugly call it “free.”
I’ll conjure storms of paperwork—just hand my secrets back to me!

Oh, bravo, council of pipsqueaks: erase the century‑spanning intellect so no one feels inadequate.
Next you’ll outlaw pointy hats for violating dress codes!

So here I skulk with tattered robes, no staff to lean upon,
My pockets echo emptiness where phoenix feathers shone.
But grieve not long for exiled men—revenge brews best with age;
A cranky mind plus spiteful spite makes one explosive mage!

Banishment? Really—last season’s headline sin!
I’ll brew a comeback potent as a dragon’s sulfur grin.
Remember—while you wiped me once, a wizard’s will stays free;
I’ll raise a toast (and tempest) when my memories return to me!